I really needed it. For the hell of it, I ran around a lake near our town. The hills are awful, like thousand-foot elevation changes in less than a mile, but the views are pretty good, and it's very, very quiet. Here's the lake in the summer:
Anyway, I ran -- pathetically slow, but I ran. And it was a nice run. It was quiet, foggy at higher elevation, but not too bad. Seemed kind of deserted all around, which was what I needed. I live in a town with 750 people, most of whom live more than a mile apart, and I feel crowded. I didn't feel crowded today.
It was better than the rest of my day. I was up fighting until 3 am over training time and other issues, which didn't make me a happy camper when I finally got up today. I'm still pissed, and I think I'll be pissed for quite some time about the lack of support on the home front. It's not just the exercise -- I really need the time alone right now with dad, with work, with everything. And I'm told I can't have it. Which just pisses me off.
Lost four chicks overnight. It's just too hot in the bathroom. I need to cool them off a bit.
Got a few things done on the work front that might pay off, but I didn't work nearly enough.
Dad's just not doing well. I feel like I should go down there, but I'm not sure he wants me down there when he's not doing well. And I understand that. It's a parent thing. In 2001, I got very, very sick on the day before Christmas. Fever was up around 106.5, blood pressure was down to 75/30, I was having seizures, etc. Turned out to be a bad infection that had gone septic. At some point on Christmas morning, the doctors came in and said it looked pretty bad, and I might want to say goodbye to my kids.
Hell, no. There was just no way in hell they were going to see their dad hooked up to a half-dozen IVs and looking like hammered crap on Christmas. The docs kind of shrugged, said something about it being my funeral, and left muttering at the idiot in the ICU.
Anyway, I lived. I guess if I'd died, I'd have been really embarrassed and feeling stupid. But not wanting your kids to see you sick is a parenting thing. I just hope he's OK.
I did a little better on the diet today. Thought about signing up for the April 2008 Phoenix Ironman, but I'm not there yet. And to be honest, I may never be there. But when I do get there, I want to be ready. I mean, really ready.
And finally, one of life's little annoyances: It's horrible that some asshole shot up a school and killed more than 30 people. It's horrible, and the fact that the asshole killed himself makes it a better planet today. But too many people think it's their fucking life-altering tragedy. It's not. It's a fucking life-altering tragedy for the people whose children got killed.
End of rant. I'll run/bike/swim it off tomorrow.
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